Clingers

This is an expression of an unhealthy need. Every human being has a mortal need for water, food, and shelter. This also includes our basic emotional need for love, affection and acceptance. When the need for human contact outweighs all logic, you have now moved yourself into the category of “clingy.” You are sending a message to your significant other that you cannot function without them and they are the center of your universe. When you do this, you hand over complete power and lose your worthiness making you last on their list of things to do.

How do you pull back?

• Figure out what you like to do and make that part of your normal routine
• Stick by your needs and compromise only if its mutual
• Find your own friends outside of the relationship
• Limit phone time between you and your partner. Give them something to look forward to
• Respect boundaries. Too much of anything is a no, no. You lose your specialness.

Stalking

Again, this is an expression of an unhealthy need. This need is to control all aspects of another’s life. They want to know what you are doing at every second of the day. Clingers beware because clinging is the beginning stages of stalking. Stalking is obsessive behavior toward an individual mentally, physically, and or emotionally. Despite popular belief it is a form of bullying. This person can not see past the action of this obsessive behavior to the point that they know its wrong but cannot stop the action.

Minor stalking is checking his or her phone when they are out of eye shot. It is also paying attention to number sequences so you can attempt to open the phone when they are not around. Some may participate in the act of scrolling up and down facebook pages trying to break the code of who they might be talking to. If you find yourself listening in on the other line during private conversations, put your name in this category. If you are calling strange numbers in their phone and cussing out anyone of the same sex you have a definite problem. What you need to realize is what is in the dark will always come to light. Most of you stalkers participate in these activities to no avail because you won’t leave anyway so what is the point.

Also, stalking is frequenting places you know a person of interst will be in attendance in hopes of setting up a supposed “chance” meeting or liking every Facebook post trying to draw attention to your existence. You may find yourself saying dumb shit because you just needed to grab his or her’s attention but having nothing to say at all. You will find yourself being ignored or responded to in as little words as possible with this person hoping you get the hint. If you find yourself gazing at pictures of this person imagining you are with them to the point of embarrassment as you’re the last to know they hate your presence.

Chronic stalking is the easiest to spot because you are so far gone you stalk your victim in public. If you find yourself tailing, staking out homes, or calling at unreasonable times of a day this is your category. YOU ARE A STALKER! If you are abusing your significant others in any way you are a stalker. Remember stalking is a form of bullying. Bullying is simply an act of making your victim feel lesser so that you have control. If you are researching your target in order to gain an upper hand and purposely driving a wedge between family and friends in order to gain complete control, you have a problem and need to seek professional help. You are not seeing past you own personal, selfish wants and acting out despite of your wellbeing.

Loners

Loners are people who prefer to be alone. They specifically avoid the company of others. On the outside, some may feel there is nothing really wrong with this person. You may even view yourself as a loner but we are talking about not seeing past your own nose. When you exhibit behavior that sections off people in your life or draws a line in regular interaction you have a problem.

Loners tend to become clingy in relationship and they usually become stalkers. There is no one other than their primary focus generating a response from there obvious mental condition. Serial killers and rapist are known to be loners. People don’t like you because they can’t relate. You march to the high hats and don’t even hear the beat. Loners are suicidal, violent, and/or seemingly mild mannered at first glance.

Most people suffering from social anxiety eventually implode. Anger is internalized and repressed channeling the energy and changing it into depression, anxiety, obsessive behavior, and/or pain. They don’t deal with the normal stresses of life normally so irrational solutions become the answers to many of their problems bringing forth detrimental results.

In summary, contiuanlly self-evaluate yourself so that your life’s journey and evolution is as positive as it can be personally and socially. Some of you have no idea that you even exhobit any of these behaviors outlined above because you refuse to be brave enough to look at yourself in the mirror. Go ahead and look, it won’t hurt a thing. It may significantlly improve your life. Especially within your social circles.

We’re watching through a computer screen the decline of mankind right in front of our eyes!

Dani Becca

On August 6, 1991 computer technology that had been exclusively utilized by scientists since 1969 was finally given to the public. The World Wide Web was birthed into existence on this day and the world has never been the same. Since that day twenty years ago, the Internet has developed into an all encompassing standard of modern life. Everything from shopping to attending classes can now be done online. Entire revolutions are now being organized through online means which has displayed the greatest asset the Internet possesses; it’s social capabilities. Anything you want to do socially can now be achieved through the Internet. You want to explore a new city or even your hometown but don’t have the friends to do so, date as many people as possible, engage in stimulating debates, or just simply want advice, you can go to the Internet. However, there are some basic principles you must be aware of when becoming socially active online in order to protect your overall well-being, life, and quite possibly your future.

Mental Illness Is Real

Most people would like to believe that they could easily identify others who may possess mental or even emotional discrepancies but the truth of the matter is neither are easy to detect. Many people in the real world with mental/emotional issues go undiagnosed and untreated for years. In most cases, their entire lives. Place these same people in an environment of anonymity such as the Internet and a minimal amount of personal information about you and there could be problems. Think of any and every mental condition that can possibly afflict a person. They are abundantly present online. Conditions such as psychotic disorder, narcissistic personality disorder, inferiority/superiority complexes and various other bipolar disorders are some of the most prevalent found online. Not to mention the hordes of depressed people that frequent online social groups to seek either sympathy or a new emotional victim to torment. The woman who always speaks in 3^rd person is transparently obvious but many others won’t be as easy to spot.

Lambs Become Lions

Ex-presidential candidate Al Gore is credited with coining the phrase, “Information Super Highway” in reference to the Internet. Nonetheless, that same “superhighway” can lead you to some of the most rancid, despicable, and cowardly people you could ever come across. These people suddenly adopt brash opinions and speech online that in-person would never dare attempt to speak to anyone publically. Often times, they characterize their own words as “keeping it real” or “hard truth” when actually it is only an opportunity to belittle, bully, or disrespect another person unsolicited. You want an example of what most of these people look like? All you have to do is visit a random Yahoo article or any opinion oriented blog site, click an article, and go straight to the comments section at the bottom of that article or story. It is a guarantee that any and everything vulgar you can imagine will be there.

Also, there are a large majority of these people with self-esteem issues they’ve harbored for most of their lives. They are the socially inept. In real life, they possess the inability to express their opinions and thoughts to others without being totally dismissed, outwitted, or looked upon as foolish. In most cases, the Internet gives them their only opportunity to ever be heard by anyone. Their lack of self-expression or intestinal fortitude in real life translates to the eye of the tiger only online. Face-to-face, they’re as timid as a sports writer is alone in an alley with Mike Tyson.

The Decepticons

It has been pointed out in study after study that unattractive people have little to zero social stock in the real world. They simply lack the physical attractiveness or money that would give them a fighting chance in many social circles. Although they may be thoughtful, deep people with nice character, these men and women generally have suffered continual social rejection. The Internet has become the perfect venue for many of the people considered to be physically unappealing because it offers the opportunity to first get to know someone before you actually meet him or her in person. Conventional dating requires that people first reveal their physical profile and only then get to know each other. On average, men tend to lie about their height, relationship status, and financially stability while women lean more to lying about their weight, age, and sexual behavior.

However, the problem that many people encounter with the un-beautiful ones online is that many misrepresent their actual physical appearance. They only post favorable, doctored pictures of themselves. If they are overweight, you will only see headshots. If they’re outside of the dating age bracket they want to be in, they’ll present only high school or college pictures. If they want to be really pictorially ambiguous, they’ll post nothing but pictures of themselves within groups of people leaving you with the task of having to pick the right person. In addition, some people don’t even post pictures of themselves. They take pictures of other people (friends, family, coworkers, etc.) and pass them off as themselves. Many people who are actively dating through online means are finding out that a picture will lie to you quicker than a person’s mouth will.

Equally important, are the people whose entire internet identity is a lie. Online, they are a complete work of fiction. Everything from their accomplishments, career, religion, relationship/health status, residency, family background, and means of supporting themselves financially are creative writing. Basically, these people create the person they would like to have been in real life and stay within that character throughout their entire online existence. Deadbeat or inattentive fathers/husbands become the greatest men to have ever lived. Birds become ladylike, virtuous, and humble. The most hedonistic and sexually deviant people become pillars religious morality. My personal favorites are the multitude of faux Osteen spiritual advisors and motivational speakers. These people consistently bombard the internet with affirmations, regurgitated clichés, quotes, and misquoted/misinterpreted scripture. Hardly ever does the online persona align with the real life person.

So many Internet relationships are built on deception and misrepresentation. Many times, before someone can verify that all they have been told over the internet by someone they are interested in dating is the truth, they are already emotionally vested and sometimes don’t want to hear the truth, or get hurt by hearing the truth. The people who are often times affected by this are those who take the Internet too seriously and who are too trusting in nature. Disappointment is a constant friend.

Promiscuity Lives Here

If there is one thing that is just as abundant on the Internet as lies, it is sex. There are entire websites dedicated to “hooking up.” Sites like OnlineBootycall.com and PlentyOfFish.com are online dating sites that are bursting at the seams with thousands of potential sex partners. Not to mention, all the other niche websites that are available for swingers and every other fetish group that exists. On the other hand, any social networking site has the potential to lead to “hook-ups.” Look at Facebook and Twitter. People are getting together in droves from these two sites and hook-ups weren’t nowhere near to being the initial purpose of the sites, but people are doing it.

What is the point? You should assume that anyone you’ve come in contact with sexually online has been with others from online also. You don’t even have to ask. Just be careful because with some people, it is so habitual to a point that they don’t even want to go out and physically meet people in real life. They hop from person to person online without giving it a second thought.

Keep It Simple and Plain

Simply go onto Facebook and if your news feed is anything like mine, you will notice that privacy is dead. Everyone with the capability to get online should not know every detail of your life. There are some things that should be reserved for more intimate conversations. If you seem to come off to others within your specified online community as aloof then so be it. Every piece of personal information that can be gathered from you online can also be utilized against you as leverage. Never freely giveaway leverage to people you really do not know. This leads to the final point…

Everyone Is Not Your Friend

The biggest illusion the Internet and social networks gets away with everyday is the trick of familiarity. People get lulled into thinking they actually know the people they are interacting with online every day because they have direct access to their opinions and thoughts. Because of this assumption, many people form online relationships that in some cases become parasitic or cancerous. The entire time they are online with you interacting and sharing, these toxic people are taking everything you give to them and trying to utilize it against you.

For example, I knew a girl who used her Facebook/Twitter accounts as a means to vent about her job and certain people involved in cases she would take on. She was a paralegal for an attorney’s office. She never mentioned any specific names or details of any cases. She would only vent about all the negative circumstances that surrounded her at work. Someone amongst her 1000+ friends on Facebook complied six months of her status updates, printed them, and mailed them to her employer. She was subsequently fired from her job. Till this day, she still doesn’t know who sent the letter. It was a hard lesson for her to learn that you can’t say everything to everybody, especially online.

In conclusion, these are just some simple premises you should be made aware of when engaging yourself in social activities online. As with everything in life, you must be aware of the pros and cons of certain things so that it doesn’t negatively affect or even alter your life progression. Although the Internet is arguably the greatest idea man has ever created thus far, it has the capability of making your life a living hell if not used with caution. Don’t consider these words to be anti-social networks because there are sprinkles of good, authentic people shooting between the tubes. Just consider these words to be your cigarette warning label, but for the Internet.

The director of the video, Ladd Ehlinger Jr. (@FilmLadd) tells Politifact.com , “I think it’s only offensive to people who don’t have a sense of humor.”

In my opinion, other than bad music and off beat rhyming, this is the same type of shit that is on WorldStarHipHop.com 24 hours a day. It’s hard to look in the mirror and see that reflection sometimes. Especially when someone else is holding the mirror. I feel sorry for the two niggers in the video. Very bad decision on their part but that’s just me…

Judge for yourself.

Anthony Weiner's junk

When this story of yours first broke and the picture of your “alleged” penis imprint in your underwear paraded in front of my eyes, my initial reaction produced light laughter. Especially being that the news media was reporting that you “allegedly” tweeted this now infamous penis imprint to one of your followers. Being that I have somewhat followed you since your failed 2005 New York City Mayoral bid, I sincerely believed that you would not be that witless to DM photo ops of your junk to some follower on your Twitter account. I solely based this opinion on being that you were, ya’ know, an actual public official with a prominent Democratic profile and all. Some political circles were even considering you to be the Democratic Party’s new “bulldog” in Congress. However, when you started the “I Don’t Think It’s My Penis But…” defense, I saw the blood in the water and knew it was only a matter of time before the feeding frenzy would go full blast. Pictures were released. Transcripts of vulgar text message conversations were dropped to the press. Multiple women claiming they’ve also had the “displeasure” of sexting and tweeting you. Basically, full blown embarrassment ensues. Why three weeks later you would fold under pressure and resign kills me.

First, let’s address what really has happened. You were pressured into resigning because of a “sex scandal” with no actual sexual contact occurring between you and these internet chicks. You were only texting and webcaming yourself to these women of various ages and professions. You weren’t even being a pervert or partaking in any strange fetish type shit. You were doing things typical of married men on the internet sending the usual penis and “look at me in and after the gym” pics. Either you are ignorant of history or you being caught embarrassed you so much that you were shook and didn’t care as long as it didn’t damage your wife’s career. Your recent idiotic incident is a Nickelodeon cartoon compared to what some of your past and present government alumni have done. Better yet, let’s take a stroll down memory lane and see if you can recall any of these names.

For instance, remember Eliot Spitzer the former governor and once Attorney General of New York who can now be seen on CNN hosting his own show. Remember, he was prostitutions blood enemy until he was found to be bangin’ high-end prostitutes for years. It’s even been estimated that he paid up to $80,000 for prostitutes over a period of several years. How about Rep. Mark Souder (R-IN). He was having a sexual relationship with a female staffer in which both made public videos promoting sexual abstinence. Then there’s Senator John Ensign (R-NV). He only resigned his position as Chairman of the Senate Republican Policy Committee after it was found he was fucking his best friend’s wife. He later resigned altogether to stop the investigation. Equally important is Rep. Mark Foley (R-FL) who resigned when he was accused of sending sexually explicit emails to underage male congressional pages. Pedophilia is something you cannot fight so he was promptly replaced with Tim Mahoney.

Now, Rep. Tim Mahoney (D-FL) was an interesting fellow. Once elected, he placed his mistress on his staff and then fired her later saying, “You work at my pleasure.” Yeah, Mahoney was Rick James coldblooded with it. He also later admitted to multiple affairs before and during his tenure in office. Brian J. Doyle, (R) Deputy Press Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security was caught by the sheriff’s department trying to seduce a 14-year-old girl on the Internet who was actually a sheriff’s deputy. He’d later be sentenced to five years in prison, ten years of probation, and had to register as a sex offender. Does any of this ring a bell Anthony or do you need bigger fish? Let’s continue with the big ones then shall we.

Ol’ silver hairs himself, Newt Gingrich (R-GA) had to resign from the House after admitting in 1998 to having had an affair with his intern while he was married to his second wife. You know what the kicker is about Newt though? His affair was going strong at the same time he was leading the impeachment proceedings of Bill Clinton for perjury regarding an affair with his intern Monica Lewinsky. I’m quite sure you remember that circus do you? When President of the United States Bill Clinton went on television irritatingly claiming that, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky.” You know how that story ended, but my question to you is do you see the overall theme of these situations? If not, the theme is actual sex Anthony. All these people and more with the exception of Foley and now you were having sex with these people.

I can spend the next 24 hours giving you countless examples of situations that were far worse than yours were but it would be a waste of energy. You’ve already resigned. I was actually naïve in thinking that you would do what Bush referred to as “hunker down” and fight for your position and standing. I don’t know if Obama personally coerced you into leaving or the entire Democratic Party’s bitchassness toward you in the aftermath but in my opinion it was a punk mistake to just resign without even fighting it. All you did was use technology to curtail your obviously horny nature with various women you have no commitment. It was simply a matter blown out of proportion by the media. Your job should not have been a victim in all of this. Yeah, you initially lied about it but who wouldn’t have lied. No one in their right mind would have admitted to doing something so stupid. It was a damned if you do and damned if you don’t type of situation.

All in all, I wish you would have at least been finger poppin’ some of these chicks. At least you would have had something legitimate to lose your job. Why you were on Twitter and Facebook DM’ing and inboxing chicks through your actual personal accounts I will never quite grasp. You could have easily setup accounts not related to you to do the things you wanted to do. Maybe you’re too square to pull off having a fake account and relied on getting women on name recognition, I don’t know. There is one thing I can tell you though. Congratulations on being the first ever public official to get exposed on Twitter and having his #TwitterAfterDark participation read and shown to the entire free world.

This film will be released in the Fall/Winter of 2011. It is directed by Bill Duke.

Go to the Facebook page “Dark Girls Movie” for the most recent information about the film.

They need to study music. I played in several bands before I began my career as a poet. There’s a big difference between putting words over some music, and blending those same words into the music. There’s not a lot of humor. They use a lot of slang and colloquialisms, and you don’t really see inside the person. Instead, you just get a lot of posturing.

Gil Scott-Heron on rappers |1992|

There are somethings in life you just never forgot. Losing your virginity. Learning how to ride a bicycle. Graduation. Having your heart stolen and broken. I was 23 years old when I was first introduced to the work of Gil Scott Heron. It happened inadvertenly. There were a group of ol’ schools (45 yrs old and up) and myself discussing the latest episode of Def Peotry at work when one asked me, “You know about Gil Scott?” My reply was ” Hell yeah, I know bout Jill Scott! She can blow.” There was a simulteanous chorus of laughter after my reply. One of the old schools smiled and patted me on the shoulder and said to me, “I’m gonna hook you up.” The next day, he gave me twelve vinyl albums and told me, “When I wanna get right and get my mind focused on dealing with these white folks, I listen to Gil.” Those albums sat in my apartment for three months untouched and unheard until one Saturday I decided to put them on while cleaning up. I only got through two albums (Small Talk at 125th & Lenox/Winter in America ) through the entire weekend. I was in awe of what I was hearing.

I had never heard anything like “Comment #1″ or “Home Is Where The Hatred Is” or “Winter In America.” Gil Scott Heron not only made me think about my environment but the powers and circumstances that created my environment. I paid more attention to politics and world events because of Gil Scott Heron. My mind was sharper and more intellectual after listening to Gil Scott Heron. He let me know that as long as I wa speaking truth that I couldn’t be fucked with at all. Never mind that he struggled with drug addiction all his life because he’s the only man I know of that recieved a Masters degree from John Hopkins University before ever completing anyone’s undergraduate program.

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Did he really have to hit em’ with the Hulk Hogan, WWF ring entrance intro from 86′…

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Is There Consistency?

Women are not as complex as people try to make us out to be. We are very simple in nature and are moved by stimulus. When we meet a man, we expect that he is presenting the person who he will always be. There is an art to courting a woman and once you feel that you have acquired “the one” your courting techniques should not cease. Courting is a beginning application to establishing and maintaining a relationship. The biggest mistake that most men make is when they try to be something that they never were or by initiating certain behavior that they cannot maintain long-term. We understand the random splurge to impress or undivided attention given due to the excitement of the chase, but when the air of newness wears off we no longer see the person we met. For example, beautiful evenings spent trading conversation and laughs turns into three word conversations over a bucket of greasy chicken. Little things like having a consistent positive attitude, remembering the things that brought you together, and applying them to the relationship contributes to gaining and maintaining a woman’s respect.

Do You Actually Listen?

In order for you to be taken seriously as the head of your household, you must know the needs of those you lead. It is already understood that as leader you have the final say but the wisest of leaders know wisdom is impartial. Listen and be willing to take a course of action other than your own if it seems feasible. As women, we need to know you sincerely value our opinion. I know women have a tendency to speak at a time where they can clearly see you are busy engaging in “man activities” but if you set a time to talk over issues of the week or a few minutes to discuss her concerns then your “man time” is yours. Also, take responsibility for your actions. Most women have outbursts with their men because she was ignored for long periods of time until it is figured out that the only means of getting a response from you is to talk to you like a child. This course of action is wrong on our part and should never be done but it is an equal or greater reaction to your actions.

Are You Really Providing Support?

All too often, men think that “providing” for their significant other or family only means financially. Yes, as the head of your household this is a major responsibility but providing emotional and physical stability is just as important as finances. Relationship expert Gregory Dale says, “Women lose respect for a man as soon as they lack the ability to provide for the family. All of a sudden we mean nothing and what we did in the past hold little weight.” This is an incorrect statement. Women lose respect when men appear to have stopped trying. Women will damn near do anything to make sure the family stays afloat. It is hardwired into our DNA. This includes but not limited to taking an unappealing job, working below our pay grade, or even starting a side hustle. For a real woman, pride is a non-issue if the children have to eat and rent is due. When we see a man sit down and refuse to seek out all avenues, women lose respect instantly.

Also, if women don’t have emotional provision respect for a man quickly leaves. Women are like flowers. We need water and sunshine in order to look and feel beautiful. The water is the complementing of her, telling her you love her, and smiling whenever you see her. Simply saying “good morning baby” when you wake up or always acknowledging her presence will feed her emotional need and the respect she has for you.

Physical provisions can be made sexually or just by subtle contact. Find out what she wants in the bedroom and how she feels about different acts or positions. The attention to detail in the bedroom translates into how you feel about the woman. If you aim to please she will follow. However, sex alone will not do. It has to be followed up with loving contact. Things such as a pinch on the cheek, a kiss goodnight, a hug for no reason, a sensual look from across the room, or even love wrestling. This validates your feelings for her and makes her feel secure in mind, body and soul. Sometimes the little things will keep you in there.

Are You Communicating Effectively?

It is important when communicating to think before you speak. Your response to whatever the conversation, debate and/or argument has to speak that of a leader. As a man, you must be rational and clear headed or else you are not fit to lead. We choose the leaders of this country on how they handle themselves in public situations and on how well they communicate. A leader must be able to avoid war by the fruit of their lips as should be the case for a head of household. I hear men complaining about the endless questions women ask but have you considered why they ask so many questions? You may lack the art of communication. If she asks you “Do you love me” it may be because you don’t show her any love. If she asks “Do I look fat” it may be because you don’t complement her or feed her emotional needs. Even a dog needs validation or you will have a sad pup.

Do You Really Have The Ability To Lead?

You are the leader and with leadership holds great responsibility. A King is only as good as his kingdom, a President as good as his country, a Head as good as his household. Respect is something that is earned in all aspects of life. The weak have never been respected despite all politically correct commentary people love to spew. Leaders cannot be weak. Respect cannot be demanded. Only children demand what they cannot have or earn. Remember you are asking a woman to put her life and well being in your hands. How can you expect total cooperation if you can’t even take care of yourself or posses the ability to seek help when you get stumped!?

As a woman, I do not condone other women to disrespect their men in any shape, form, or fashion. However, I do understand the frustration of being under incompetent leadership. If you as a man cannot control your household, it may be a reflection of the work you put into it, the type of woman you chose to lead, or the back seat you chose to sit in. I admonish you not to take offense to what is being said here but to understand what you are asking for when you aim to LEAD and complain about DISRESPECT.

Wake UP!

I just recently watched a documentary on a man linking up with a woman on Facebook. He found out later that this woman didn’t exist nor did her circle of friends. This woman constructed a whole new identity using pictures she found in magazines and online resources. I consider this very sad and desperate but even more diabolical. Please keep in mind that this female Photoshopped in friends, family, and pets to build this identity to sell a bogus bi-product of who she wanted to be. She actively operated over 40 Facebook profiles which all of them possessed their own identities and then photoshopped in friends and family for each profile to support this one personality. This man fell in love with a lie and once the truth was realized a year later, all the little inconsistencies that he ignored during the “relationship” all became clear.

Of course, this story is on the extreme side of the spectrum of betrayal and deceit that can be harvested on Facebook, but we see this everyday on various levels. You need to learn how to spot these inconsistencies from the beginning and step away quickly if you are going to play the “Facebook Dating Game.”

For example, this is an email I received from a married man last week:

“Hey beautiful lady, I cannot stop looking at your pictures. You are one overwhelmingly sexy woman. I hope I am not being too forward but I would love to photograph you. I own a small production company and I think you would be perfect for an ad campaign I am working on. I know you don’t know me and this email is odd but I feel like I just have to get to know you on some level. Can I take you out and show you a good time I have allot of connections and can really take you places. Please accept my friendship or more .”

I looked at his profile and it turns out that he is newly married and in the Army. His pictures consist of family and friends, none of which look to be taken professionally. Furthermore, in his list of hobbies were reading, playing basketball, and sports. There was nothing about photography in his profile whatsoever. He lives in another state with is wife and two children but is stationed in my state at a fort nearby. Apparently, he doesn’t think that I can read or discern that his façade is paper thin so I emailed him back.

“Hello. Wow, thanks for such flattering complements. Who would have thought I would be spotted by a professional photographer as yourself and get a job sight unseen. I guess I would be extremely excited if you weren’t trying to use this bullshit ploy to search out fuckable prospects. Maybe I should click on the link to your wife and send her this email. I wonder if she would sing praises of your wonderful work as a photographer. I wonder if the Army knew you were doing this type of stuff, would allow you to continue to serve with them. Looks like with your 10 years in, it would be a shame to throw that all away for an easy piece of ass. You know what?! We can meet up if you want. Not a problem. Let me contact your wife and find out what would be a good time for us all to meet up and take pictures.”

It takes a day or so but he responds:

“Fuck You!”

This email is one of many men claiming to be something in order to deceive me for whatever personal reason he has conjured in his naughty little head. Facebook has it all. Married men parading around as if they were single and the people with no real physical life beyond their front door but have built themselves up as a virtual dream to the opposite sex.

The Facebook Fraud

A couple of months ago I spoke to a woman in which we have a mutual male friend on Facebook. I don’t know her but she was upset because of what linked this man and me together. She read a conversation as to us meeting up for some drinks and instantly became worried. She goes on to ask questions about him and our relationship together and states that he has been getting money from her and promising her they would be together. I research a bit more into this and found a few other women placing the same allegations on this man. I had to admit to this woman that we are only friends but if she felt that she was being taken advantage of she should discontinue communication. I pegged him from the gate as some sort of user due to my talent of spotting con-men but to what extent I did not know until recently. As a friend he is a very cool person but as the layers of his façade were peeled back he has proven himself as nothing more then a con-artist and digital gigolo.

I recently came across a female who we will call a serial poster. Her main objective is to build up her sexual self esteem. What is a sexual self esteem? This type of esteem is how a person feels about himself or herself sexually. You will most likely never see anything but their face and their conversation is basically centered on or around sex. They are very outspoken or even crass about this topic and seem to have no concern about how others view them. They prop themselves up to be sexual Gods to gather attention from men which basically turns out to be disrespectful. They are in-boxing your husbands and sending them special Photoshopped pictures of private body parts which may or may not be their own. In real life, they are more than likely overweight, single, and overlooked by men in public. These people are invisible in everyday mild mannered America, but within these social networks they never fall short of attention and praise by the oversexed and perverted scourges of the internet.

If you are not aware of some of the Facebook personality traits, here are some to look out for:

The Holy Roller

Catch Phrase: I am blessed and highly favored.

These people cannot talk about anything with out linking it to GOD. There is always some underlining theme to a post or discussion but can never back up their claim to righteousness. In most cases they are on the low hooking up dates of infidelity or adulterous acts. Their profile picture is most likely a picture of Jesus or Praying hands but if you look through their profile pictures you can see them half naked taking provocative pictures in their bathroom.

The Casanova

Catch phrase: I love women.

These men never have a bad word to say about a woman. They send virtual roses and teddy bears wishing hopes of a good day. Their friends list is mostly women of countless beauty in which he hopes to cash in on his stock of e-pussy. They never say they are not ready for a relationship but keep you on the string as the one if they were.

The Professional

Catch phrase: Success is made by those willing to sacrifice everything.

They dress the part. In every photo they are dressed to kill with not a picture out of place. There virtual persona is impeccable and well established. It reads proof of income, status, admiration, and class. Everyone in there world seems perfect and there might be a celebrity or two thrown in for good measure. The catch is to make you think they are more important then you and build this feeling of being worthy to be around them. There total objective is to have you buy into their world for monetary reasons only. They take your money and run.

On the whole, men and women alike are bullshitting their way through social networks in hopes of finding the next victim. The next victim could be you if you’re not careful. The next time you cross paths with the extraordinary, I urge you to look beyond the surface. You just might be giving someone who was extremely ordinary or maybe even insignificant to the world and people they actually know too much attention.

WAKE UP.

FACEBOOK: Changing People from Ordinary to Extraordinary by Wake Up Ph.D. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

In my opinion, he’s telling the truth and shaming the devil. Kinda. Sorta.

What do you think?